Welcome to the Ape Zone

Location of primate related content.

New radical game in development

New unrelated madlibs site

About the Ape Zone

The Ape Zone exists within our metaphysical reality to serve as a reposatory for Ape-Related Content

Ape Observation Zone
The ape Observation zone serves to document and present accurate information on the many varietys of ape and assign a quntifiable and arbitrary score out of 10
Ape Variety Comments On Ape Ape Rateing

Chimp

an angery chimpanzee
  • A Classic ape
  • Monkey with gains
  • Wont live past 15
  • Understands, crafts, and utilizes Tools
  • also weapons
  • looks are decvieing
  • Capable Of Violence
  • and cruelty
  • Closest liveing primate relative

7.5/10

Proboscis Monkey

funny lookin Monkey
  • Frankly I didn't know this thing exists
  • Looks funny
  • May have no Soul i mean look at those eyes
  • Found on some island called Borneo
  • Always seem a bit sad
  • Dad Bod
  • May commit infanticide

6/10

Mandrill

  • Bigest monkey
  • Bad Posture
  • Rather Colorful
  • A group of them is called a horde
  • probably wouldn't fight it
  • Never seen one stand
  • but I imagine it would be quite terrifing

7.5/10

Orangutan

  • Orange
  • Impeccable cheekline
  • Known to chill in trees and eat fruit
  • A bit fat
  • A good bit lankey
  • The most Intelligent of apes
  • Critically Endangered due to palm oil
  • May seek revenge
  • Can utelize tools
  • Sinister intentions
  • Can also be found on the island of Borneo

9.6/10

(-0.4 points) Face flaps kinda wack

Gibbon

  • Fun name to say
  • effective insult as well
  • Lanky ass arms
  • primary method of locomotion involves these arms
  • Can launch itself off a branch up to 50 feet
  • Can leap 28 feet
  • Fastest thing to exist in a tree
  • Currently not hostile

10/10

I find them amuseing

Noteable quotes from apes

"Give orange me give eat orange me eat orange give me eat orange give me you." -Nim Chimpsky (November 19, 1973 - March 10, 2000)